Yesterday, my husband asked me to wash his uniforms for work. Of which, I gladly complied. However, when he awoke and asked about his uniforms, I realized I had not dried them yet. As I was quickly moving individual pieces of clothing into the dryer, I found a clean pair of uniform pants. I started the dryer with a shirt in it and a few moments later also found a clean shirt already in a pile of folded laundry. So imagine the dismay I felt when my husband realized today that I STILL had not dried the load of uniform clothes from yesterday. Luckily, I had the shirt dry from yesterday and just had to dry a pair of pants. However, it's moments like these that make me think I am SO bad at this job.
From then, I swirled into a self pity mode of all the things I do wrong and can't keep up on. Then a situation from church on Sunday came into my head. My children were in Sunday School. My husband stepped out of the sanctuary for a moment and inadvertently heard what was happening in the class. Apparently, some of my children kept speaking out of turn and the teacher had to remind one of them THREE times to raise his hand before speaking. I started to think "oh great, my children are the ones who can't raise their hands and act like civilized people". I even asked my husband today if I could go back to work... somewhat half jokingly, somewhat hoping he'd say sure.
So even later this evening... well into the early morning hours, I sat watching some TV. I turned off the TV before heading to bed and just sat in the dark silence enjoying the light show that was happening outside. I said a quick prayer, like a "what am I doing, Lord?" type prayer.
As I sat in the darkness, memories of a book club I attended last summer came flooding back. We studied a book called "Home School Supermom, NOT". In it, and in countless other stories I've heard from home school moms, we question our ability to do this. We ask ourselves if we are messing up our children for life. Will they get into college? and etc. Over and over I've heard stories of moms who have asked these same questions and have gotten to the end and realized they DIDN'T mess up their kid. And YES they were able to get into college. And YES some people do have messy houses!!
I felt encouraged just by the memories and I think the spirit of the Lord was ministering to me. So I wanted to share my encouragement with others. The devil wants to steal our joy and make us feel incompetent to do what God has called. But through Him, we are able to do all things (Phil 4:13) He has equipped us to do this great work (2 Tim 3:17, Heb 13:20-21).
I hope this encourages you to press on in whatever God has called you to at this moment. It's probably not easy, but God has a purpose and a plan in it! Press on toward the goal of the prize (Phil 3:13-15)!!
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